Lefty: Republicans showed their true, undemocratic colors by starting this new session by limiting voting time for each proposal to five minutes. They began this vote while many congressmen were still taking their seats, clearly with the intent to disenfranchise their Democrat colleagues.

Connie: Republicans passed a sensible rule to curtail Democrats' abuses of the system. Their ridiculous and purposeless delay of the previous vote wasted all our time.

Farrah: At least we can all come together over a good boner joke.

Lefty: Bipartisanship is dead. Republicans killed it. How else can you explain Rep. Regula's absurd motion that the Democrats be forbidden to make coffee?! Simply because they had the foresight to bring a coffee-maker?

Connie: Please. The Democrats' coffee was a transparent attempt to make working conditions unpleasant for Republicans. If they just wanted coffee, they would have shared.

Connie: Thank the Lord that someone finally moved to censure Rep. Frank, who has been out of order this entire session. I also think the public should know about Rep. Frank's lucrative Petco endorsement. They pay him to mention their products on the floor.

Lefty: I think we can all agree that Rep. Stark's call to return to a civil discussion of budget alternatives rather than mud-slinging and partisan wrangling. Also, Rep. Hastert has biker friends? Should we look into that?

Connie: Is David Obey on drugs? Does anyone really love budgeting so much that they feel the need to bang on the podium?

Lefty: I think we would all appreciate it if you would stick to substance, Connie, instead of throwing about absurd accusations. Rep. Obey's speech on Alternative E was concise and persuasive. "We are throwing money down the rat hole with missile defense." Were truer words ever spoken?

Farrah: Rep. John Murtha echoed his call to withdraw the troops from Iraq. "The burdens of this war have not been shared equally," he said, in support of Dem. Alt. E. "You can't claim to be pro-defense while supporting a budget that is anti-military families."

Lefty: I think Rep. Ryun's slogan-slinging "Victory to the GOP" only revealed his unwillingness to compromise and listen to reason.

Connie: When will Chet Edwards stop saying "the president's home state" every time he says Texas? We know where the president is from. We know where Rep. Edwards is from. If you want to talk about rhetorical bullshit, let's talk about that.

Lefty: "We need to maintain our nation’s competitive advantage," said Rep. Edwards. He rightly favors keeping America a leader in technology and innovation. Disagreeing with this is unpatriotic and, frankly, disgusting.

Connie: Ah, Rep. Pryce--one of my favorite House members. She very sensibly questions the merit of the disastrous Democrat budget alternatives.